Abandonment

ABANDONMENT

Never had I dreamed to travel so far...

Never could I imagine, your celebrations at par...

Without me; this precious!  

Without me, your charm filled with ARMOUR!!!

For some luxury, For little power POWER

I was banished to Thou's Abandonment.

Nor did I Lie: Nor did I die...

I believe soon my journey would END, 

Yet promise to wait, And the DAY will come

thy your regrets!  thy your loss!

Leading thou towards my day...

I promise to wait, And the DAY will come..

Day would be me, underneath the coffin,

And you will be my observer, peaceful into the sleep!

you will see me carefree and relaxed; from the moment, from the sound.

Your tears might roll out. Yet, I will abandon you, the way you abandoned me.

Romance as eternal Monarch

Obliged to monarch; 

where romance finds the passion!

May these lanterns enlighten your way towards the one! 

Surely it would be the journey with trails and errors.

If lust ever meets you, teach it to love!

If love ever finds you, cherish with life!!!

The more you love, the more it flames,

It's no fire;yet it blames!

Blames the uncertainty and the lies;

It will hurt. It will pain.

Unless you love. Just don't deny.

You may win... You may lose...

Trust your heart, until you meet

 'Romance as eternal Monarch'.

Dear BUTTERFLY

I readout somewhere, "while BUTTERFLY in one hand seems delicate; on the other it symbolizes depth and power." I felt funny reading the line, at that point. And for a person who is  rough edge hopeless spoiled personality, it would obviously not go with the flow. I won't deny that somewhere inside I was dead with lack of hopes and motivation. I also accept I was lacking the determination and inspiration for anything new in life along the personality issues. 

Yes, my life wasn't going interesting or any adventures unless you entered. I bet neither you nor I have this first proper impression over each other. Seriously I find you so annoying with that cold arrogant look of yours. Thanks to those opportunity and compulsive situations that made us meet more; while it even helped us to create many more impressions. I can just imagine what stuff are running crossing your mind while reading this😅. I realized my judgemental opinion towards you gradually transforming from the arrogant larva to delicate butterfly. Of course I only got the meaning of "while BUTTERFLY in one hand seems delicate; on the other it symbolizes depth and power" after getting along with you. You looked arrogant yet you were delicate; you were delicate yet you always drove me deep. I know I Am going to complicate this but trust me I won't regret this complication. 

After loosing the determination, motivation, hopes and compassion for anything new may be you were the U-turn that diverted me towards the passion. I won't mind saying the irritating larva to my eye had transformed into a butterfly which was inspiring me with a passion to glow and grow. Dear BUTTERFLY! you brought me this sensation of warmth and filled me with energies all over. It does sound dramatic but I have realized many magical moments being around with you. I don't want to idolize you as an angel watching over me. The flames of passion to dream from you vs the feeling of jealousy to see you around anybody else vs satisfaction of finding you around I always felt as if am struggling my soul again and again; and I don't find any other words to express it.

Dear Butterfly'! Without letting you know, " you have been this impulsive nature of mine still I adore you from my heart and soul. Every single time you have passed by I have struggled to keep myself calm and controlled by not letting out the hearts expression over my face. I feel like my belly full of butterflies cuddling and dancing from inside. But the best part of these struggles are those surprising encounters of ours. Trust me your face can't lie or may I say i wish I could surprise you more occasionally😉." It sounds like a cheesy chemistry but no you have always belonged to me as my secret romance. The romance that I never expressed; rather deep down my heart always cherished. 

Out of all the chemistries, I choose you to be  My BUTTERFLY. BUTTERFLY, that has guided me towards the journey of practical dreams that I want to achieve. Since you are the cause and effect for my passion and hope, I wish to save you in my short stories as a secret influencer. Dear influencer, I do accept I have a secret BUTTERFLY and that's you... The one that have gone through all my lines.

Thank you!!!

Blessed with the aroma of love

Dissolving life into a tragedy and despair may be I have lost enough! Enough moments to live within the joy and pleasure to please this life. May be I was to impacted with those criticisms. With all those criticisms they made; somewhere I got entangled underneath their criticism and opinion. And I frowned! Yeah, I frowned fearing their opinions will soon drag me lower and lower... I frowned enough to forget what freedom was in my past life. I frowned where I forgot to glow as me. Rather, I tried to get adopted as their opinion forgetting where I belong. 

Luckily, I woke up... I woke up after a long sleep where I tried the best way to get adapted. This morning, I was touched by a faint rainbow... Where the faintness had driven me to a different diameters and dimensions; filling me with hopes that life and love will find me very soon. Things will go back to what it was then.  Once again I will be blessed back with the aroma of love and living. I won't deny I lost my lights somewhere on the way. But I trust that I will once again turn into the firefly chasing the darkness, enlightening the hopes for joy. 

COVID-19 and the government response Nepal

Nepalese understand that Nepal is a poor country and we don't have enough budget and resources of our own or create the ventilators and mechanism  to treat the COVID-19 patients. While on the next hand my government is rich enough to separate the budget of 6.5 billion to purchase the vehicles for respectable's.

Dear government, the only greatest effort from your side during the COVID-19 pandemic is the months of lockdown and more lockdown. Many places lack the PCR tests and RDT tests. Dear government thank you for being so irresponsible during the pandemic. But incase I get to be infected with COVID-19, I will be responsible enough to make sure I don't be any medium to transmit COVID-19 in my community and family. While I would think many more times if I get an opportunity I will surely transmit the Corona virus to those irresponsible heads from the government. I would feel glad if few of them actually end themselves (those who are neglecting the crisis and prioritizing the service and those luxurious vehicles) due to Corona virus.

The reason I am saying this is, in other nations the government is trying to fetch more practical and possible solutions to tackle and control Corona virus. They are trying to save their best doctors, nurses, teachers, scientists, engineer, etc. along their citizens. While in my country citizens are still helpless to stay home. Country's economy is sarcastically falling down.Dear government, what about the country's resilience? When will we be resilient?? When will things go back to normal. Even the results of the tests are verified and testified only after the death of any individual. My dear government why so much of irresponsible-ness?? Why can't Nepalese enjoy the legacy of democratic republic as we have been paying you the tax on time. During this pandemic, we expected the the government to use of our taxes for the betterment of people and the country while fighting COVID-19. But you truly disappointed us; deciding to invest it upon the luxurious vehicles. Dear government who will ride those vehicles, as you will be extending the lockdown time and again. 

What Counts as me? : Soul of desire, dreams and longings

What counts as me???

Failing to find life in physical self;

May I drive towards the unseen soul?

But what includes in the soul:

Is it the emotional and the intellectual vibration?

May be I seek to look after waves to awaken me from within. 

But will the waves include my desire, dreams and longings? 

Following myself selflessly, I see a bigger picture.

Somewhere I dream to be free.

Free as bird, free as butterfly,,,

Somewhere I want to be steady.

Steady as mountains or those rocks,,,

Some how all I want is to explore! 

Explore within myself, Explore beyond myself!!! 

But where will my exploration lead? Puts me in dilemma!

For all I have dreamt of are the moments I shall cherish.

Cherish all my life from nature along my nurture! That's it!

I wanna gaze the gradual warmth of rising sun;

Even the cooling breeze of brightest moon.

Follow the streaming river unless the meet the silent sea.

Drool through the hottest Ray's of desert to chilling on the lea.

Wish to listen to the surrounding; in it's happiest and in its saddest,

Wish to enjoy the magnificent gleam of sunshine in my gladdest.

Never know what awaits the next, But all I long for is to travel!

Just to find out, "What counts as me?"

For all; I want to find myself in my soul of desire, dream  and longings!

---

What counts as me???

What shall a life brought to be?

What shall a life brought to be??

To be me??? To be me???

Is it my soul? Or my body?

Where does the life in me lies!

If it's the soul: why did i never saw it?

If it's the body; Which part??

What counts as me! Which part counts as me??

Which part does my life lies???

Is it the eye or the ears...?

One saw, one heard; it's their function. 

It's their function. Not my life!

Could it be the heart, mind or the mouth?

One's beat keeps me alive,

One's thought marks me intellectual,

While one's words explains my persistence!

in between, where do I count my life?

What shall a life brought to be? 

No clue I am so not happy, staying still.

Shall my soul know? What truly counts?

Counts as happiness, luxury, living: Or 

Or should I say, What counts as me. 

What counts as me???